A Letter…Not Sure Who From


Welcome to another edition of the, er, we’ll say bi-weekly mailbag. All questions are from spammers who send their letters via courier, whether that be in Skyrim, New Vegas, or the Commonweath.

If any humans would like to send a question, PM me here or email them to kristakahashi@gmail.com. Just make sure to let me know this is for the mailbag and that you want your name public, or else I will attribute your question to spammers.

On to the mailbag:

Sadat X asks:

You said in the podcast you would never want to make an IP, is there a game you would like to mod?

Well, I should make a correction. I would never want to single-handedly make an IP. I don’t know what impresses me more about Undertale, the story or the fact the guy made it in GameMaker. This is the kind of stuff you’d have to program into the game just to make your character walk.


/// Script Move State

// Get Length
if (xaxis == 0 && yaxis == 0) {
len = 0;
} else {
len = spd;

// Horizontal and Vertical Speed
hpsd = lengthdir_x(len,dir);
vspd = lengthdir_y(len,dir);

// Move
phy_position_x += hspd;
phy_position_y += vspd;

// Control Sprite
image_speed = 0.2;
if (len == 0) image_index = 0;

if (vspd > 0) {
sprite_index = spr_player_down;
} else if (vspd < 0) {
sprite_index = spr_player_up;

if (hspd > 0) {
sprite_index = spr_player_right;
} else if (hspd < 0) {
sprite_index = spr_player_left;

if (right_key && shift_key) {
phy_position_x += (spd + 2)
image_speed = 0.4;

if (right_key) {
phy_position_x += spd
sprite_index = spr_player_right;
image_speed = 0.2;

if (left_key) {
phy_position_x -= spd
sprite_index = spr_player_left;
image_speed = 0.2;

if (left_key && shift_key) {
phy_position_x -= (spd + 2)
image_speed = 0.4;

if (up_key && shift_key) {
phy_position_y -= (spd + 2)
image_speed = 0.4;

if (down_key && shift_key) {
phy_position_y += (spd + 2)
image_speed = 0.4;

Just looking at that gives me a headache. This is just the movement, you then have to make pixel art that syncs up to each keystroke to simulate walking, and make sure the avatar faces the correct direction, and make sure it collides with objects in the game world, which means creating objects for the game world, which requires more artwork, and BLARGHBLEAGH FUCK THIS SHIT I QUIT.

Now, if I had a billion dollars and a billion monkeys and three or four flunkies? Then maybe. I think the main draw would be the chance to make something completely slightly more somewhat original. That’s what I like about the Fallout universe, the 1950s twist gives it a texture that no other post-apocalyptic wasteland has.

The genre would really depend on what felt more fresh. As of now, I think I’d like to do something with a hip hop slant. One thing I would keep from the Fallout template is a badass DJ, only it’d have a totally different vibe.

Grand Puba asks:

Have you really joined the Twitter?

Yeah. It’s sort of an experiment, really. I was talking to Viridiane the other day about how “easy” it is to build a follower base if you’re willing to put in the work. Not because people find your nightly shitposts interesting, but because no one ever unsubscribes to anything. I still get junk marketing email for a bank account I closed a decade ago. Why? Because I’m too fucking lazy to click the unsubscribe button.

So I feel like if you’re a dedicated tweeter or blogger, as long as you keep your feed free of spam, there’s no reason you can’t gain a dedicated following. Still, I wasn’t entirely sure, so I decided to do an experiment. I am going to tweet stupid shit every day and see how many followers I can accumulate. Then I’m going to compare it to how many I got last year (12) from saying absolutely nothing.

So caveat emptor, if you’re subscribing, expect high quality shitposts like this and other pointless musings.

Lord Jamar asks:

your mod is GREAT. i dont know how u got so many good VAs jesus

Drugs, mainly.

DJ Alamo asks:

Why does Fallout 4 get so much hate? I hear people say they dislike the game but when you ask them how many hours they played it’s almost always over a hundred.

Well, I think Bethesda titles are a lot like Star Wars. For better or worse, they’re going to be scrutinized like lost works of Shakespeare found in the Ark of the Covenant. Better, because it means people have a strong emotional attachment to the franchise. Worse because it will cause them to pick out every flaw, zit, and slightly irregular nipple from now until the end of time.

While that’s part of the fun, I’m not entirely sure a movie (or game) like that is meant to have the kind of intellectual capital that requires a frame by frame analysis, or reveals something about the human condition. It’s popcorn for the mind, and I judge it more based on how it tastes when I’m eating it as opposed to the long term health effects or the culinary genius of its mechanical, corn popping chef.

This isn’t to say that space operas or video games can’t have these sort of deep, resonant experiences, and high quality in all phases should be the bar. I’m just not sure if it should be the standard. It’s certainly not something I expect to find when reading the nutritional value on the box. So a lot of it is perspective and expectations. My hopes for Fallout 4 were simple: a fun game in a new setting, with interesting characters, good exploration and companions with depth. For me, the game may not be a home run, but it’s a ground rule double based on this conversation alone:

Good writing? Check. Immersive, completely unexpected interaction between two great NPCs? Double check. Adorable husbands and waifus? Triple check. The game is full of these little bits, both via dialogue and exploration, and it’s enough for me to forgive the fact that there’s a tad too much combat.

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