Waifu Companion

> Scripts > Province Bay > Waifu Companion

(mumbling, reading note) “Under the light of the full moon, a taut noose makes the dead man dance…,” the fuck that’s supposed to mean…

hears hostile sounds, enemies attack

Fuck!

fight off ferals/lurks, but sees player and points weapon at him/her

Who the fuck are you! You with Jack’s crew?

Whoa, whoa. Easy there.
Easy there? What am I, your fucking horse? You can’t be with Jack, not when you talk like that.

Hey, hey, just calm down okay? I just wanna talk to you.
Where do you think you are, a goddamn bar? This is the last place you wanna shoot the shit.

Get that gun off me or you’ll regret it.
No, I don’t think I will. Not until I get a good look at you.
Hm. You’re definitely not one of his. You don’t got the sickness.

Put the gun away. Nobody needs to get shot here.
That’s your opinion. I still haven’t decided yet.
You don’t look like one of his though. It’s the eyes. You don’t got the sickness.

But I guess it doesn’t matter. If you aren’t some pirate here to take what’s mine, then you’re just another tourist.
Do yourself a favor and stay out of my way.

Do you mind if I just take a look around?
Sure, but if you find anything connected to Silver’s cache, I can’t let you leave with it.
The bastard took something that belonged to my old man, and I aim to get it back.
Problem is, with Silver dead, all I got to go on is his diary, and it’s filled with more code than words.

That’s awfully rude.
(Sarcastic) Sorry, didn’t mean to hurt your feelings, you big fucking baby.
But the adult here is gonna keep looking for Silver’s cache, and make things right with her old man.

Is there anything I can do to help out?
Well, if you’re here, you might as well make yourself useful.
I’m looking for something that belonged to my old man. A piece of treasure Silver buried before Jack sent him to the locker.

What are you looking for?
Something that belonged to my old man.
Silver buried it and the rest of his treasure right before Jack sent him to the locker. I aim to find it.
Thing is, the bastard hid it under a storm’s worth of puzzles, traps, and lies.
Trying to read his diary’s like trying to shit with your elbows.

Just listen to this trash. “In the house of God, under the light of the full moon, a taut noose makes the dead man dance.”
Is that even English? Fuck. I mean, I get the “House of God” part. It probably means “Church.” Everything else is just gibberish.

Full moon? The moon doesn’t even shine in this place. Goddamn riddles, they never mean what they say.

solve the puzzle, use moonlight sonata sheet music to play on guitar, which causes corpse to drop from the ceiling. Key or Map is attached to the corpse’s neck.

Holy fucking shit, it’s a map…not sure what to make of it…but it’s a fucking start.
But we’ve got a problem, seeing as you’re the one who found it.
(sigh) Fuck me for saying it, but here. Fair’s fair.

Are you sure?
(reluctantly acknowledging) Yeah, I’m sure. I may be a killer, but I ain’t a thief.
But the way I figure, that map is no good without Jack’s diary.
Not to mention you need someone to guide you, get you in places a tourist ain’t allowed.
How about you take me with you, we find it together, and in exchange, I get a piece of that cache.

Sorry, not interested.
Fine, can’t force you. But good luck making heads or tails of that without Jack’s Diary.

Works for me. Good luck.
Hold on, you may have the map, but you’re still an outsider. You won’t get so far as a one-legged mule without me to guide you.

(Treasure that important?) Are caps that important to you?
It’s not the caps I care about. Doesn’t matter if you’re a feral or a Pharoah, it don’t mean shit if you can’t take it with you.
Silver stole something of mine. Personal. That’s what I’m after.
The money, the power, all of that’s piss in the rain.

 

(alternate)
You got the map, I know the island. Way I figure it, we can find it if we work together.

Let’s find it then.
Good. We’ll need to start by meeting with Flint. We’ll need passage across the island, and no one does that without speaking to him first.
He’s over at the theater, stuffing his face while the rest of us dig for scraps. We can go whenever you’re ready.

Sorry not interested.
I’ll think about it.
(Treasure that important?) Are caps that important to you?
Like I said, it’s not the caps I care about.

on the way to theater

With the war going on, trust is hard to come by. Can’t go poking around the island without people accusing us of switching sides.
That’s why we’re gonna have to bargain with Captain Flint for safe passage.
If you know him like I do, it’s signing a contract with the devil, no denying that.
But we got no choice if want to go where the map takes us.

go to theater

No one’s allowed in the theater unless you’re part of the crew.

Sorry, no tourists.

Rules are rules. 

Since when am I not part of the crew, you bloody bilge rat?

Fuck Zoe, didn’t see you back there. You friends with this tourist?

Friends, fuck buddies, what’s it to you? Just let us inside before I tell the crew what I caught you doing the other day.

I don’t know what you’re talking about.You didn’t see shit.

Oh? So I didn’t walk in on you giving your dick an Indian burn to pictures of Keith McKinney.

Jesus, you don’t have to do me like that. 

Then let us inside.

All right, all right. But don’t blame me if the Captain burns your ears off.

enter, see Flint watching movie, gives long monologue about how a villain can be seen as a hero based on perspective, and that his crew should watch the movie again.

So no, I don’t care how many times we’ve watched it this week. I want you to watch it until you know every scene, every line by heart. And until you do, you’ll run it, again.

Sounds like brainwashing if you ask me.

Zoe, my child, if understanding the motivations of your fellow man is brainwashing, then I weep for our society.

It’s not a society, it’s a band of fucking pirates. And the only thing that’ll keep them under your greasy thumbs is caps.

And how will someone like you help me with that?

I got my ways. But I’m gonna need passage into the Dead man’s cove.

Hm…Dead Man’s Cove. That wouldn’t by chance be the same place we get our saltpeter from, would it? And the saltpeter, of course, is how we make our gunpowder.

I’m asking for a pass, not a pickaxe. I’m not going there to mine all day and die of fucking lung cancer.
Fact is, with the war going on, we both know you run that operation tighter than a flea’s cunt. So if I go there without your okay, your boys will shoot me on sight.
All I want is safe passage.

That’s still not much of answer. But all right. You’ve caught me in a generous mood, and lucky for you, not a curious one.
I’ll give you passage, but in exchange, you’ve got to do something for me.

Just name your price, you overgrown bloodbug.

I see a year on the docks hasn’t done anything to fix that mouth of yours. But fine. To business then.
Jack and his tanker boys have been prepping for another attack.
You’ve probably heard rumors they’ve been making inroads on the coast, but I’m not worried.
Everyone knows the fastest way between two points is a straight line.

What, you wanna take Franklin Square? I thought Lady Aria said she was neutral. “No fighting on her turf” and all that.

Not every battle is won with blood and bullets. In business, caps are every bit as effective.
I’ve heard a rumor that one of Aria’s business partners, Arthur Graham, is looking to sell the Blue Moon. But I need someone who isn’t connected with our crew to handle the buy.
From what I understand, your friend here is new to the island. 

I’ll provide the funds. All I need is her name on the lease.
You do that, and you’ll have a free pass from here to the marshlands.

(Alternate) All I need is his name on the lease.

Fine. It’s a deal.

to player

Not too bad for a devil’s bargain. Far as I can tell we still got our souls, but you’ll have to stand in front of a mirror to be sure.
Jokes aside, we can’t go in thinking this deal is going to go smoothly. Flint wants us to do his dirty work for a reason.
Let’s just go there, sign the papers, and get on with our hunt.

 

go to the Blue Moon Club

We’re here to see Graham. He should be expecting us.

Right this way.

So the pirate princess herself is a guest at my club. Funny, I didn’t even know you liked the blues.

I don’t. This is business.

I’m surprised Flint even lets you make deals. Didn’t your father betray Silver for 500 caps?

So it’s 500 now. Last week it was seven.

Well, you know how these stories go. People like to gossip.
The way I heard it, Jack paid your old man to do it. Others say he was just a bleedin’ coward.

Either way, Silver’s dead, and the island’s at war. And war is bad for business.

People might call you a coward for taking your caps and running.

Oh they will. But the difference between me and you is I don’t give a shit what a dead man thinks.
And while you’re all busy killing each other, I’ll be at the Taphouse, sipping on wines older than the colonies.

Enough with the fucking lectures. Here’s your caps. Just tell us where to sign and get out of my face.

No worries. The docs are on the table. Just sign on the dotted line.

player doesn’t sign

Is there a problem? The thing’s as legit as a doc gets.

I’m not sure I should trust you.
You shouldn’t. But this isn’t your deal to make, is it? You’re here on behalf of Flint.

No problem at all.
Good, then I trust we have a deal.

No, I need more time.
Well, right now you’re wasting it. Just sign it so we can get this deal done. Otherwise we’ll have problems.

Sorry, but I don’t believe you.
You’re just a pawn. You don’t get to have an opinion.

(frustrated at all the talking) Ugh, let’s just hurry up and do this so we can get out of this shitty club.

player signs

A pleasure doing business with you.

(sarcastic) Yeah, yeah, it was an absolute joy.

(chuckles at her rudeness) Heh. You may find this hard to believe Zoe, but I like you. I really do.
So I’m gonna give you some parting advice. You might think yourself a Modern Day Mary Read, but all those swashbuckling, badass pirates you read about in the stories? They all died on the noose, doing the dead man’s cha cha.
Your old man? He did you raw, leaving like that. But the one smart thing he did was leaving this island. 
You’re only gonna prove him right if you kill yourself being stupid.

if player reads copy of document, and sees it’s got fine print

Hold on, let me see that. What the fuck is this? This ain’t got shit to due with the club. It’s a bounty on Lady Aria.
Did you think we wouldn’t read it before signing?

Well, I’ve got an explanation for that.

Starts running

You motherfucker!

kill goons and Graham

Damn, greedy bastard tried to set us up.
If it was me, I would’ve just signed the thing and been done with it.
Flint will be disappointed, but Lady Aria will owe him a favor. Might be a good idea to see her instead.