Just quit my last job, looking for another.
Work for me
Well, ain’t that a bit of luck. Where do you need me?
Idles
From most to least I got four loves in my life. Guns, beer, fur, Jesus. Wait.
I got four rules. Always shoot first. Then second, third, and fourth. Pretty good rules if you ask me.
Eat every part of the kill. That’s right, even the ass.
Tatos is tay-toes
My four favorite foods are bacon, steak, and tatos. Hold up. (counts in head, maybe mumble 1-2-3) Yeah, that’s right. Those are the four.
Brahmin is bra-min, h is silent
I’ve smelt a lot of manure in my time. Brahmin shit, dog shit, people shit. When you live on a farm, it comes with the territory.
The road of life is paved with blood, bullets, and brahmin.
You can’t waste time if you spend it hunting.
I view scars as notches on my belt.
There’s a lot of raiders in the Commonwealth. Big raiders, little raiders, skinny raiders, and fat raiders.
They should call themselves roaches, the way they multiply.
Never piss off a deathclaw before checking your ammo.
I don’t know who the Institute is. I don’t know what an Institute is. So don’t ask me for my opinion on ’em.
From what I know about Jesus, he was a real badass. Had a machine gun and a belt full of bullets for anyone who sinned.
If you were a real sinner, Jesus would nail you up on a cross and then go to work on you with a two by four until you confessed.
Everything I know about the Bible I read from this comic book. Tells the whole story of creation, from Adam and Eve to the time Jesus sold the dinosaurs to the aliens.
There’s ten commandments in the Bible, and about nine of ’em have to do with hunting. Not sure what the other one was, but it’s probably safe to ignore.
Deathclaws aren’t as scary as they look. You bust out a minigun and they’ll get as nervous as a turkey on Thanksgiving.
yao guai rhymes with cow pie
I once got into a wrestling match with a yao guai. Beat him down so bad he taught himself to say “uncle.”
For whatever reason, I can’t grow a mustache. I’m guessing Jesus did it to make me humble, because I’m pretty much great at everything else.
The scar on my cheek I got from a molerat. Thing just jumped out of the ground and gave me a kiss.
So I returned the favor and gave his tummy a little knife rub.
I got scars all over. Some of ’em have stories, some of ’em I just plain forgot about.
You can be whatever you want to be in life. I could probably grow three more inches if I put my mind to it.
I love me some guns. Pipe guns, miniguns, machine guns…if it’s got the word “gun” in the name, I’ll be walking it down the aisle.
You can never have too many guns. That’s a Bible verse I just quoted by the way.
In the beginning, God created heaven and earth. Then he said, “Let there be guns,” and there were guns.
The man had his priorities straight.
I used to have a dog that I traveled with. Real good hunting dog. Only problem was, the greedy son of bitch would take all my kills!
Dogs are natural hunters. Not as natural as me, but pretty damn close.
Some animals can smell you comin’. Well, not me, cause I’m just that good.
Yeah?
Need something?
How’s it goin’?