EXT – Docks
A fishmonger is standing on the docks of a lake, frustrated beyond belief. He can’t understand why he continues to fail at fishing. Meanwhile, Skjari, an amateur free diver, mocks him from a nearby rowboat. On her boat is a basket full of fish which she caught with her bare hands.

 

It’s not fair! I don’t know how she does it!
She must be cheating somehow.
It’s the only explanation that makes sense!

Got something to say, Igram?
Then at least have the guts to face me!
Oh wait, I’m sorry, that is your face! Hahaha!

Player speaks to Igram
How is it that Skjari catches so many fish?
She hasn’t trained to be a fishmonger like I have. Her family are mostly cobblers.
And yet here I’m the one who’s catching nothing but boots.

It’s all in the technique.
Then how do you explain Skjari? She has no technique, no training, but she has all the fish.

It’s because I’m better than you, you sodding boot fisher!

Rrrrgh…Do you see what I have to deal with?

Make sure you’re using the right bait.
I don’t think it’s a matter of bait, because Skjari and I are using the same lures.

I have no idea. I’m terrible at catching fish too.
Don’t feel too bad. In my expert opinion, I’ve determined it’s pretty much impossible.

My recommendation is to whisper sweet nothings to the fish. Works every time.
At this point, I’m willing to try anything. I am not willing to try that. Skjari doesn’t have to, why should I?

It’s probably because you smell.
What? I don’t smell at all, and that’s the problem. I want to stink like Skjari. She catches so many fish, she’s like a walking sardine.

Hellos

What now?
Oh, it’s you again.
There must be a secret to it. This shouldn’t be so hard.
Skjari doesn’t even use a pole. It’s obscene.

How is Skjari so good at catching fish?
I wish I knew. She just reaches into the water and grabs them. It’s not fair.
I’m the one with the fishing pole. I’m the man with the family legacy.
Of course, I have a theory as to why she’s so good at it. It’s because she cheats.

How does one cheat at fishing?
How else? With bribes! She obviously paid the Watcher of Heart a fortune in salt and wine.
It’s the only logical explanation.

Watcher of Heart? (elleh-fah-nah)
What? You’ve never heard of the legend of Ellefana’s Tears? They fell from the sky and formed the lakes and the fish.
I don’t know the rest of the story, but that much you should already know, unless you’re a foreigner too.
They seem to be multiplying as of late.

Do you know a man named Hiroki?
The Easterner? Nice enough fellow, can’t understand a word he says though.
Come to think of it, I guess I don’t really know if he’s nice. For all I know he’s calling me a whoreson in very kind tones.

What can you tell me about the area?
Not much here other than fish and the folks who make it their life’s mission to catch them.
But if you take the path across the bridge, you’ll reach a fork in the road. Check the road sign, and it’ll update your map.
One path leads to Sunset Village, the other to the Flame’s Cradle.
You’ll eventually want to go to Cindra though, and the Temple of Light.

Is there anything I can do to help?
Yes…yes there is. But first, I’m going to need some bolts. Crossbow bolts to be specific.
There’s probably a bunch at the wagon by the bridge.
There were two sacks full of nuts and bolts and I seemed to have grabbed the wrong one.

I’ve got your bolts here.
Great! In exchange, take these nuts. I certainly won’t be needing them.

Why do you need crossbow bolts?
Glad you asked! I’ve heard from my fellow fishmongers that the easiest way to catch a fish is to put it in a barrel and shoot it.
Now, I’ve got a crossbow to shoot with, and thanks to you, I have the bolts. All I need now is some barreled fish.
So, I was wondering if you could possibly grab a fish from the lake and bring it here.
Then I’ll stick it in one of the barrels full of water and take a few shots at it. Shouldn’t need more than a few.

I’ll help you catch a fish.
Thanks. And remember, size isn’t important, but it has to be alive. Otherwise it doesn’t count.
Wouldn’t that make me the person who caught the fish?
Of course not, you’re like a fishing pole, hooking the fish. I’m the one who then reels the fish in. By shooting it.

Maybe some other time.

I’ve brought you back a fish from the pond.

(fish dead) If I wanted to catch a dead fish, I’d just go to the market.
(fish alive) Great! It looks like a lively one too. But don’t worry, I’m a professional. I can take it from here.
I suppose you’ll want a reward of some kind. I don’t have much save this rusty pair of boots.
Why don’t you take this pair, and a few coppers for the road.
They’re using up valuable space in my basket, and I’m sure it’ll be full of fish soon enough. Here.

[Darkness] I’ve brought you back a fish. Still alive. Not dead at all.
I’ll be the judge of that.
[Failure] Hm…I don’t know. It doesn’t look like it’s got much life to it. Better find another one.
[Darkness + 1] Hm…it doesn’t have much energy, but my expert eye says this fish is definitely still breathing. I can take it from here.
I can’t wait to see the look on Skjari’s face when I show her my catch.
This will be like shooting fish in a barrel. Exactly like it.

You’ve done your part. Now leave the rest to the professionals.

Have you been able to shoot the fish?
No. It’s proven a lot more difficult than I anticipated.
The barrel seems to provide the fish protection from my arrows. It’s like a suit of armor really.

You could try opening the barrel.
Well, I actually tried that first. It didn’t go all that well.
So I figured, maybe I need to close the lid to lull the fish into a false sense of security, then shoot the barrel from the side.

Ugh, do I have to do everything for you?
Of course not! I can do this! Maybe.

[Heart] Have you considered changing jobs? You may have other talents.
[Widsom] It’s pretty clear that you just aren’t good at this.
[Failure] Nonsense! I’m Igram Sea-Bird! Fishing runs in my blood!
I won’t let one fish in a barrel bring shame to my ancestors!

[Success] You might be right. Fishing’s been in my family for generations, but maybe the talent skipped me.
But what will I do? I could try my hand at being a farmer, but I don’t even own a shovel.

Here. Take my shovel. 
Really? You’d do that for me?
It looks like a fine shovel too. I could maybe start a garden.
Passing through here, I saw some good soil over by the Watcher’s statue. I’ll try growing something there.

I’ve got a shovel, but I’m still using it.
Ah, that’s fine then. But let me know if you no longer need it.

Thanks for the shovel. I’ll try to make good use of it.
Maybe Skjari will even lend me some seeds from all the fruit she eats.

I could find a shovel for you.
I’d appreciate it. In the meantime, I’ll take a few more cracks at that barrel.
Well, good luck with that.
Yes, I’m due for a stretch of good luck I think. Be seeing you.

Garden post-quest
Ah, the garden is turning out splendidly!
Dare I say, I have a talent for this?
And do you know what the best part is?
The look on Skjari’s face when she sees my plants are thriving!

What should I plant today?

I love spending all day feeding my little garden.

Gardening is much more rewarding than fishing. Mostly because plants stay put.

I hope the soil around statue is getting enough light. I’ve heard the nights are long where the flame is out.

I’m glad you restored the fire here. Now my plants get all the light they need.

(if a dead fish is “caught” by Igram)
The fish has been slain! Or caught, rather. By me.
Funny thing is, none of my bolts actually hit the fish. The force of my blows must have shook the life out of it.

Fisherman post-quest
My ancestors are smiling on me now.
Skjari make think she’s the better fisherman, but now that I’ve caught my first fish, it’s only a matter of time before I catch them all.
Now I just need to figure out how to get more fish in this barrel.

 

Skjari
What do we have here? A fish out of water? You out here for a swim, fish?
Well, if you don’t want to get hooked, stay close to Igram. Only thing scared of him are boots.

What do you use to catch fish? 
Just my bare hands. If you have enough strength, it’s all you need really.
Is the fishing out here competitive?
Why, do you see any other fishmongers here? All I see is that boot fetcher by the dock.

How’s your day been?
Good. I caught a fish today. A real big one. Bigger than a man’s ego, that one.
Then I just let it go, because I could. I can always catch a bigger one tomorrow.

Why did you let a fish go?
Why not? Plenty more where that came from.
Besides, I hate fish. I just grab ’em because it pisses Igram off.
And when I set one free, it pisses him off even more. I should do that more often.

Do people swim in this lake?
Fish swim. People use boats. Rowing is a better workout too.
But if you want a quick boost of strength, grab a banana from my boat.
People say mutton will make you strong, but it just makes you sleepy. Fruits and nuts are much better.
And fish too, but I hate fish.

Hm?
Yeah, fish?
What now?

Post-Quest Hellos
I’ve got to thank you. Watching Igram try to shoot that fish has been the highlight of my week!
So Igram’s a farmer now. He’s damn good at it too. Harder to poke fun at him now, but at least I get free food.
I don’t believe Igram really caught that fish. Something about it smells…well, you don’t need me to say it.
Igram won’t shut up about the fish he caught. He’s really getting on my nerves.
So the blind squirrel found a nut. I’d like to see him do it again before I believe he can see.

What do you think of Igram’s little farm?
I’m not sure how he grew it so fast, but things around here have always been a little strange.
Don’t tell him I said so, but he’s got a real talent for the work.
He’s probably a better farmer than I am a fisherman, and seems to like it too.
Goodbye.

Igram caught a fish?
Maybe. But it took him more than a dozen shots to do it. He’s still a bootmonger in my book.

Scene 2 – Igram has fish in barrel and shoots it with crossbow
You put any more holes in that barrel, and the fish might swim out!

Didn’t your mother teach you not to poke a man with a crossbow?

Ha, with your aim, I’ll be just fine.

Scene 3 – Igram “catches” the dead fish player put in a barrel
Hey Skjari! Guess what? I’ve caught a fish!
What have you done today, besides making the world a sadder place!

Wow Igram, you caught one whole fish?
Well, that’s one more than I expected, so good for you!