ZYNX

So much for the fucking jarheads who lived here. Let’s go find the armory, that’s where the good shit is.

Hmph. That’s it? You’ll find more guns in a Megaton drain pipe than this dump. No wonder this country went to shit.

“The Republic of Dave” is basically a fucking slaver camp. The only difference is the collar’s wrapped around their brains.

Rookie camps like these are like putting on a wet sock. Makes you want to bleed them dry.

I got respect for slaves who get out. Even more for the kind that stay alive.

This place is too clean for a raider hideout. Any dipshit rook who lives here probably eats cake and caviar.

suburb
God, it must’ve sucked to live in a Pre-War town like this. Bombs did ’em a favor.

Fuck Mister Burke and fuck his bomb. Seems to me you’d make more money killing these assholes one by one and looting the corpses.

Glad you fixed the water leaks. The more these settlers drink, the more blood squirts out when we pop them.

hooker hired
Going upstairs with Nova, huh. Ain’t no shame in getting a taste. Just let me know when you’re done.

Tenpenny Tower. Just a bunch of pissmuppets jerking off to the size of their wallets. We ought to kill the lot of them.

Megaton. Just another town full of shitstains and cuntroaches. We should fit right in.

The Canterbury Cumrag. The sooner we get out of this shitweasel of a town, the better.

Cans, corn flakes, and cocksuckers. Just your typical grocery list, I’m sure.

Judging by the size of her gun, I bet Grandma Sparkle could fuck shit up if she wanted to.

Fucking lurks are just a bunch of oversized crabs. Soft as mush under those shells.

It looks like the people here ignored the first rule of the wastes. Don’t get killed by your own dinner.

These fuckwit scabs don’t have a right to call themselves raiders. Not if they’re letting molerats take them down.

Surprised there’s still whiskey on those shelves. You’d think it’d be the first thing to go.

So this zombie makes Ultrajet, huh. A skill like that might be pretty valuable to the right gang.

If these dogshits spent more time shooting bullets instead of paintballs, maybe they’d have better aim. Nice graff too. I can’t tell if that’s someone’s tag or if they just barfed all over the side of the trailer.

This is some nice real estate. Let’s evict these worthless fuckslugs and clear out the safes.

Friendship Station. Lot of gangs used fight over this real estate, back when downtown was somewhere worth being. Now it’s just a super mutant fuckhole.

vault full of clones named Gary
Fucking Garys are everywhere! If I were you, I wouldn’t let even one of those cocksuckers touch me.

These Brotherhood cunts will only get in our way. I say we let the muties waste them, and then clean up their mess.

MQ01 stage 141 to 150, outside GNR
Fuck yeah, now that was a fight! We kill a couple more of these big motherfuckers and I might just cum.

So this is GNR central. When you see Three Dog, toss him a few caps and tell him to buy some better taste in music.

zDCWorld03 or  zcChevytoVernon
I know for sure there’s a gang that hangs out at Dupont circle, and they ain’t the only one invited to the party. Ghouls and muties get drawn to that fountain like flies to shit.
So it doesn’t matter what station we use to get to the Mall. You got killers coming from all directions.

DCWorld03 DupontCircleMain
A walk in the park, and a bullet to the brain. Traveling with you has got its perks.

zDupontBoutique (Lady Frumperton’s Fashion Boutique)
The fuck kind of nname is Lady Frumperton?

FFRaiderCamp21 distance 1536
A camp this nice will be crawling with new blood soon enough.
Raiders are like roaches. You can’t get rid of us. We were made for this world.

ffsupermutantcamp04
Mutants are smarter than they look. Got a fortified camp, and enough refugees tied up in titjackets to last them through winter. Problem is, they didn’t account for us.

set FreeformDC.YearlingMadeOffer to 1
We should just write our own books, and sell ’em to that Scribe. I mean fuck, it’s just a bunch of words on paper, how hard could it be?

Flooded Metro
Yeack. It smells like a wet donkey in here. You sure you want to take this tunnel?

[Essential] Don’t take any unnecessary risks.
Ha, are you saying you want me around? Sure, you’re the boss.

[Non-Essential] Do whatever you can to win a fight.
I always do.

Hello/goodbye
These ratfuck bastards won’t know what hit ’em.

MQ01

Is it true your old man’s gonna bring clean water to the wastes? About time somebody did something about that shit.

mq02
10 Find the Museum of Technology.
20 Retrieve the Communications Relay Dish.
30 Find the Washington Monument.
40 Repair the damaged radio relay.
50 Icon check Speak to Three Dog about Dad.

You wanna help Three Dog? Fine. Just don’t make it worse by listening to him.

So Three Dog is back on the air, huh. Thanks for that. I almost forgot how much I hate that whiny little prick.

MQ03

10 Gain entrance to Rivet City.
20 Talk to Doctor Li about Dad and Project Purity.

So what are you gonna do when you see your pops? Give him a hug, or punch him in the face?

30 Look for Dad in Project Purity’s Control Room.
40 Search Dad’s holotapes for clues to his location.
50 Listen to Dad’s personal journal entry 10.

MQ03 30
Fuck this is one fancy ass lab. Your little cuntwaffle of a dad’s been holding out on you in more ways than one. Fucker had to be knee deep in caps to build this place.

If you want my opinion, I say fuck your dad and his shitty ass pipe dream. If you can’t handle a little shit in your water, you ain’t fit to survive anyway.

60 Gain access to Vault 112.
65 Put on a Vault 112 suit.
70 Icon check Sit in the unoccupied Tranquility Lounger.

MQ03 65 70
You want me to kill this robot or what?

Doctor Braun is one sick puppy. Only someone completely off his rocker could’ve invented that Pre-War turdbucket.

Doctor Braun was one sick puppy.

mq05 10/20
Your dad runs more than an asshole shits. If he doesn’t slow the fuck down, I’m gonna pop his kneecaps.

mq05 75
Come on, let’s go! We’re gonna miss out on all the action!

mq05 80/85
Fuck, I hate running, but these five little pussies will get us all fucked. We’ll need to get rid of them first.

Citadel Worldspace
Huh. I always thought the Brotherhood of the Tit-Brains lived in a castle. You know, like knights. But this shithole looks worse than a raider camp.

MQ06 40
Lamplight caverns is where all those snot-nosed brats live. But those little cunts have guns and they know how to use ’em, so don’t take ’em lightly.

mq09 60
Shit, I was worried there for a second. I’m the one who supposed to kill you, not these fucking Enclave bitches.
Now come on. They’re waiting for us back at the Citadel. Let’s see what that pathetic excuse for an army cooked up while we were gone.

MQ11 30
Fuck, that robot looks fucking badass. I can’t wait to kill it.

The robot is on our side.
Just until we get that laser shit offline. Then it’s fair game.

Do not, I repeat, do not shoot the robot.
Don’t worry, I won’t hurt their precious little pet until we get rid of the Enclave. But after that? I can’t make any promises.

I can’t wait to kill it either. But let’s wait until after we drop the barriers.
You got it boss. We kill the Enclave, we get the water, then we unleash holy hell on the Brotherhood.

That robot will fuck you up.
That’s what they said about the fucking Deathclaws and yao guai and every other big, mean motherfucker I’ve ever went toe to toe with.
All this tin can has is bigger toes.

What about the purifier? Are you gonna help us get it back?
Sure. Never thought I’d join forces with the Brotherhood of Dildos, but as long as I get to do the fucking, then I don’t care whose side I’m on. Let’s do this.

MQ11 200

So you brought clean water to the wastes. Ha, but don’t worry, the people who drink it are still dirty as ever.

That too will change in time.
You think so? It ain’t like we turned to killing because the water tasted like shit.
Only difference between now and before is how dry the throats are before we slit ’em.

I’m fine with that. The goal was to fix the water, not society.
And who says it needs fixing? Everywhere you look you got blood, guts, and terror. That ain’t a society, it’s a fucking utopia.

I wouldn’t want them any other way.
Neither would I. I like the Wastes just the way they are. Completely fucked up.

So what do you want to do now?
I say we find that walking cyborg motherfucker and take that shit down. Other than that, whatever you’re up for, I’m game.
As much fun as we’re having, it might even be worth it to let you live.

MS01

I don’t give a shit about Red, and I don’t give a shit about this town. But I’ll kill muties for free.

MS02

Freaks in costumes, ha! I love it. What these two capeshits need is a villain. I say we help them out.

MS03

You call that a bodyguard? Hmph. I could take him.

There’s only one thing Moira needs to write in that survival guide of hers. Stay the fuck out of my way.

saloon

Ghouls, hookers, and drinks. The only difference between this bar and a raider hole is the smell.

This assclown is holding down a mansion and two whores all by himself. I don’t know whether to be offended or stand and clap.

Not sure why you’re bothering to help Sugartits over here. She won’t make it to Rivet City in anything but a bodybag.

MS04

10 Find Bryan Wilks’s father.
Fire-breathing ants? You gotta be fucking kidding me.

20 Deliver the bad news to Bryan Wilks
Fuck, you gotta respect a guy who takes down a horde of ants before kicking the bucket. Too bad his kid is such a fucking pussy.

30 Remove the source of the Fire Ants.
35 Investigate Marigold Metro Station and remove the source of the Fire Ants.
40 Eliminate all five Nest Guardians from the Ant Queen’s Hatchery.
42 (Optional) Do not harm the Ant Queen.
43 Send the Inhibitor Pulse from Lesko’s portable terminal or Kill the Ant Queen.

Goddamn I hate bugs. I’m gonna have nightmares for weeks after this shit.

45 Return to Doctor Lesko.
50 Return to Bryan Wilks.
52 Find Bryan Wilks in Grayditch.
60 Icon check Find a home for Bryan Wilks.

Well I’m glad that shit’s done. Still don’t know if we got ’em all though. This whole town needs to get fucking nuked.

MS05

I don’t know who’s dumber, the soda slut who prays to a fucking soft drink, or the dumbass who thinks giving it to her will get him laid. Either way, this entire town is one big shit bath.

Either way, that entire town is one big shit bath.

MS06

Siding with the slaves

Hmph, never saw myself as a freedom fighter. Just make sure we get to kill someone.

Siding with the slavers

I don’t mind helping Leroy out. Fact is I agree with him. Sure, I was sold to slavers. But I made it out. And if these slaves wanna do the same, we’re gonna make sure they earn it.

MS08

Learn more about the escaped android.
5 Visit Rivet City to learn more about the android from the Commonwealth.

You know where this doctor fucked up right? He gave his little boytoy android a brain.

10 Search for clues about Zimmer’s missing android.
11 [Optional] Discover what Dr. Preston knows about the android.
15 Continue to search for clues to the android’s identity OR tell Zimmer he’s dead.
20 Find out what Pinkerton at Rivet City knows about the android.

So what are you gonna do when you find this droid? It ain’t like he got rights. Then again, people don’t either.

ms08 not completed, zimmerprod > 0 
Whoever this replicant is, he shouldn’t be too hard to find. Just shoot everyone, get a lick of that blood, and see which one tastes funny.

100 Icon check Report to Zimmer OR warn Harkness about Zimmer.

So you turned Harkness in. Not like I give a shit.

Telling Zimmer his pet bot is dead was a good move. He may be a walking toaster, but that Doc is a bonafide freak. Believe me, I know ’em well.

MS09
10 Deliver Lucy’s message to Arefu.
What are you, a fucking courier now? If this bitch wants a message sent to Arefu(Ar-ah-foo), she can do it her damn self.

15 Discover what the Family did in Arefu.

20 Check the West Residence.(see blood and guts everywhere)
Ho-lee shit. I stand corrected. This little detour might be some fun after all.

21 Check the Schenzy Residence.
22 Check the Schenzy Residence.
25 Report to Evan King.

Fucking townies man. Biggest whackjobs in the wastes.

30 Locate The Family.

These shitbirds think they’re vampires? Like, sucking blood and Count Dracula and all that shit? Ha-ha-ha, what a bunch of tools.

40 Locate Ian West.

Seems to me these people are just run of the mill killers, and this West kid is no different. After all, it takes one to no one.

50 Speak to Vance about Ian’s decision.
60 Icon check Return to Evan King.

Can’t say that wasn’t a hoot. Fucking-a. Vampires. Get a bunch of crazy fucking ass-drinkers together and who knows what they’ll come up with.

MS10

stage 10 or higher, but less than 40

Sorry if I burst out laughing. But it’s hard to keep a straight face when these nature-fucking hippies are wearing branches on their heads.

Siding with Harold
10 Enter the caves below and destroy Harold’s heart.
40 Icon check Speak with Tree Father Birch.

I don’t care about giving Harold mercy. But I do wanna see his little worshipers flip the fuck out.

Siding with Tree Father Birch
20 Apply Birch’s Sap to Harold’s heart and stop his growth.
40 Icon check Speak with Tree Father Birch.

So you let these shit-twinkies keep their magic tree all to themselves. I would’ve burned them all, but whatever.

Siding with Leaf Mother Laurel
30 Apply Laurel’s Liniment to Harold’s heart and accelerate his growth.
50 Icon check Speak with Leaf Mother Laurel.

So these trees are gonna spread all over the wastes? Let’s just hope they’re the kind that scream loud and burn slow, just like they’re daddy.

Burning Harold quest complete, OasisHostile = 1

 

Ha, I never thought I’d get to hear a tree scream. Now making campfires won’t ever be the same. We’ll just have to burn some people along with it.

 

MS12

10 Kill Roy Phillips and his followers.
11 Kill Roy Phillips and his followers, or Help the Ghouls get into Tenpenny Tower.
20 Report back to Chief Gustavo.
100 Help the Ghouls get into Tenpenny Tower.
101 Help the Ghouls get into Tenpenny Tower, or Kill Roy Phillips and his followers.
120 Icon check Tell Roy Phillips the Ghouls can move in.

This place smells like rich people farts. Let’s get out of here before I start shooting people.

So it’s kill the ghouls or kill the humans. We could let them kill each other, but what’s the fun in that.

 

I don’t know why Roy and his ghoul scabs would even want to live in this shithole. But who knows, maybe they like the taste of vomit.

 

hallowed moors cemetery

One time a couple of the gang decided to hang a few mutants from the rafters. The whole roof collapsed on the dumb fucks while they were sleeping.

HOPE LIES

 

 

“the good lord” here sounded sarcastic, needs to be sincere in her belief

Hard to let a bunch of murderers walk away, but we gotta be smart. Besides, the good Lord will make sure they get theirs.

 

VMQ01

10 Find the men who tried to kill you.

This guy who shot you seems like he’s always one step ahead.
Well, I don’t believe in shortcuts, or skipping on ahead. But maybe God will do us a favor and put a banana peel on the stairs.
Then all we gotta do is catch him slipping! Ha-ha-ha!