THE SOLDIER AND THE CADET
Scene 1
I don’t know how you do it.
You don’t think I get scared? I’m a woman. The Legion will just cut your head off.
God only knows what they’ll try to do to me.
That’s even worse. I don’t want to think about you dying too.
Then you better have my back.
Scene 2
What happens if they don’t come for the dam? What if they go for something?
That’s not their style. They attack things head on, and they never quit. So make sure you don’t either.
Scene 3
I hear you’re an expert marksman.
Yeah, but I’ve never killed anyone before though.
You got family back home Jenkins?
Yeah. A girlfriend and maybe a baby on the way.
Then that’s who you think about when some Legionnaire is coming for your throat.
Scene 4
What do you on your off days?
I don’t know. I just sort of sit and think about how I’m gonna fight.
That’s not healthy. Play some cards, have a drink, loosen up.
But what if the Legion attack? I want to be ready.
You wind yourself up the way you’re doing, and you’ll kill yourself first.
scene 5
You hear that gunfire last night? Couldn’t have been more than a mile out.
Just some of the boys out letting off some steam.
How do you know it wasn’t coyotes? Or raiders?
Probably cause I was out there with ‘em.
TOWN CHATTER
Scene 1
Did you hear what happened to Linda?
Yeah. She was a tough son of a bitch too. But Super Mutants are on another level.
Don’t I know it. Arm wrestled a mutant once, was like trying to bench press a truck.
Craig, if that isn’t a load of horse shit, I’m going to have to ask why there’s so many flies around your mouth.
Hmph, says the guy who told me he once kept a yao guai as a pet. John, you lie so much you’re basically a rug.
Ha, fair enough asshole. So who won this fictional arm wrestling match of yours?
Do you even have to ask?
Well, I’ve seen your arms. So no, I guess I don’t. What I can’t figure out is, how they’re still attached to your body.
scene 2
You notice the weather’s getting a bit colder?
Colder? If anything, it’s getting hotter.
The weather, or the climate?
Is there a difference?
Sure. Weather’s what we got now. Climate’s what we’ve been getting now, later, and back then.
Well, I went outside yesterday, I went outside today, and I plan on going outside tomorrow. And it seems to me that in this case, weather and climate is the same fucking thing.
scene 3
Still trying to figure out what to get Margaery for Christmas. Unfortunately “psychiatric help” is not an option.
Well, that depends on how far you’re willing to go. I’m sure there’s a chem that’ll fix her up just as good as any shrink.
Craig, are you suggesting I get my daughter, my pride and joy, hooked on drugs? I’d say if there was a line, you’d just about crossed it.
Michael, the day we met I hit on your wife, killed your brahmin, and got you so drunk you nearly shot your little girl while she was still in your balls.
If you had a line, we wouldn’t be friends.
scene 4
The other day Margaery sent me money for my birthday.
That’s because she takes after her dad. Lazy as a preacher on Monday morning.
Well, it would be fine if it was just that. But she didn’t send me caps. She sent me NCR money.
Why? Is she stupid? Or is she trying to get us to use her money?
Don’t know. She’d be insulted if I even asked.
scene 5
How’s the wife?
Chipper as always.
And your kid?
He joined some gun-toting crazies out east.
What? Simon isn’t old enough to even hold a rifle, let alone shoot one.
Simon? Ohhhhh, you mean the kid I had with my wife, as opposed to you know, yours.
Fuck off, Craig.
Scene 6
Why do they call ’em “potato crisps?” Aren’t they potato chips?
Don’t know. I’ve heard people on the other side say chips are french fries.
The other side? What, you mean hell?
The other side of the Atlantic. Not exactly hell, but from what I’ve heard, it’s pretty damn close.
Scene 7
Is Clancy still up for tomorrow?
Said he can’t. Said he was going to the doc to donate some blood at the clinic.
That’s admirable. Never could do it myself.
Why not?
I don’t know. I just can’t imagine my blood swimming around in some other guy’s dick.