Character Profile – Bergrisar

2013-04-26_00011Some think Berg is Nord. But Berg is Jotun, Giant. Just puny type.

Name for Giant come from Norse mythology. Berg know this because he has wikipedia. Of course, Berg name come from same place. Bergrisar, mountain giant. This Berg know because mod author is s’nua amott, lazy cunt.

When Berg milk mohroktha, mammoth, he wonder why author cannot give Berg own name like others. He have to steal it. Berg think his word for woman come from German word because author more lazy. So to author, Giant is part Nazi. It make no sense, just like Berg’s metal club. If mod author had woman, Berg would beat him into cheese then make him cuckold. Then he make female grunt like fat cow. Berg only need chance.

But Berg know no fraulen in Mundus fat enough to sleep with mod author, so point is vrokmot, moot.

Some think Berg was first choice. But he not. Berg only exist because big Jotun no talk. So author make puny Jotun and give him round ear. Now author know how make Giant talk, but does he give Berg new ear? Does he give Berg wood club? No, he keep Berg puny because he ikja rakki, bitch.

Forgive Berg, he not always complain so much. He blame mead sauce made by cranky Nord, which not Berg’s people. Real Nord hurt neck try to kiss own face. Berg not so vain. He knows he born puny. But he knows he fight big. Jotun see this and someday teach him make cheese. Someday Berg even make chief, and own many wives. This Berg’s biggest pride. Then he give all other Jotun metal club and see how they like.

But Berg digress. He finish by say jakranu, word of thanks. He think blog is orend klorun, sucks.

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